fuckmeimadj:

scareofbreath:

John still had some of his suits left over from the game. Heh. …heh. John was casual pretty often. Heck, he really liked his godtier outfit. It was probably the comfiest thing he had. He guessed it was mostly because it was game magicy stuff and it was perpetually comfortable and never faded.

But… John was… pathetic. Very much that. If he was being honest he was still hung up on a lot of things that he’d probably never be able to let go of. It upset him to think that someone could find something to like in him - Dirk could find someone so much better than him. But John was a lonely, desperate kid, and the notion of affection and, if he was gonna be hopeful about it, maybe… stuff beyond that. His blush darkened. “I… I didn’t think you…” Helpless laugh. “Man, I’m really fucking oblivious.” For someone that was so hell-bent on being loved he sure was shit at noticing when people had… a thing for him.

Dirk had a few suits of his own. He had to dress up for work occasionally, after all. Maybe one of these days they could get fancy together and do something. But for right now, this felt nice. It felt…right. 

The waitress brought their drinks and Dirk sipped his with a little smile as he watched John blush. “Well, I guess I wasn’t really making myself too obvious.” He shrugged, “Didn’t wanna scare you away or anything. Honestly, even just being there for you was enough for me. I guess I’m not as needy as I thought.” He shrugged a little, smiling and continuing, “I don’t know why you’re so surprised though. You’re better than you think, John. I don’t let just anybody into my bed with me at night and I sure as hell don’t usually cuddle them to sleep.” 

John would have liked that. He liked all his suits pretty much, and never had an excuse to wear them.

“I guess I just have a hard time believing people… want me? But ah…” He smiled a litle sheepishly. “You’ve been nothing but generous with me, so I guess I just figured it was altruism rather than genuine affection and interest.” He shrugged a shoulder, sipping his root beer and staring blankly at the table. Ah…. hm.

“I still feel bad for that,” he sighed quietly, playing with his straw wrapper absently. “It.. I shouldn’t have let myself in without asking.” He grumbled a bit and rubbed his eyes under his glasses. “I just.. didn’t want to be alone after that. I was afraid I’d… do something stupid.” The finality of the rejection had really hit him hard.

“But I-” He struggled with his words a little, eventually balling up the paper wrapper and tossing it off to the side of the table, out of his reach. “…thank you. For this… date. And for liking me. It… makes me feel a lot better about myself.” Who thanked someone for a date like that?? A+ John, sheesh.